58 - american angel notes from the left edge of america (the year after the fall)

tuesday november 13, 2007 2:08PM santa monica, california

an open letter to kamela in thanksgiving;

dear kamela,

a year ago on this day i wrote my first cambridge entry to this “american angel” journal.

it was short and sweet. unlike all my other long winded entries. it’s worth copying here;

monday november 13, 2006 12:18AM cambridge, massachusetts

in my apartment 203.

tired and ready to sleep.

***

here i am.

with love,

bernie

***

and so began my great time as damiel in cambridge.

we were really beginning work on a new play, even though we had played it in amsterdam. the significant change for me, of course, was in my playing damiel.

final angel notes from the old new world (cambridge) - 37

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monday december 18, 2006 12:10AM

just left the gang at tommy doyle’s. much life left in the evening but. . . the body and mind and heart slow to the end. craving solitude. the pain in the right hamstring from my high kick. so appropriate to injure this on the last day. tempted fate on so many moves during this show. this little injury is good to slow me down. it takes a certain energy to heal. slowness. quiet.

i leave on the 11:40 train in the morning.

this final entry. should have some import. some summing up. perhaps in the morning. right now, it’s over and i don’t feel a thing. except this general sadness to do with death. sleep come free me. this beautiful journey is now over.

american angel notes from the old new world (cambridge) - 36

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sunday december 17, 2006 6:45AM

inside still closed eyes, i saw renate’s face. in beautiful profile. straight on.

“this could be a beginning of a story.”

and now awake. for now awake.

it’s the third week of advent. a third candle added. to increase the light as the light decreases. before it begins again to increase. and that’s the promise. history proves the promise. a long history of the light not letting us down. each year, like clockwork. waits sings;

“you can never hold back spring.”

closing time.

american angel notes from the old new world (cambridge) - 35

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tuesday december 5, 2006 noon

today is my sister dawn’s birthday. happy birthday dawn. i realize for the first time my parents gave their first daughter the name of dawn. born during the first week of the glorious season of advent. the celebration of the waiting on the coming of the light.

dawn.

happy birthday dawn. i’m glad you are my sister.

american angel notes from the old new world (cambridge) - 34

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saturday december 2, 2006 9:30AM

this play is all about the value of the story. the necessity of the story.

it is good i am telling this one in these journals. thank you didi. thank you gideon.

as cornel west and tavis smiley spoke in the ames courtroom of the austin hall of the harvard law school yesterday, they re-enforced this. as they spoke of martin luther king jr., and marcus garvey and john coltrane and rosa parks (yesterday the anniversary of her bus ride). as they quoted these men and women. they’re just taking up the story. keeping the story alive.